Julia Roberts (43), one of Hollywood’s most beloved actresses, hasn’t had much success lately. In 2010 alone, she starred in 2 huge flops – the horrendous Eat, Pray, Love & Valentine’s Day. Julia started to realize that she would have to take desperate measures to regain her popularity.

With the help of her agent, Julia started brainstorming ideas to help her get back in the spotlight and make herself relevant again. She contemplated posing nude for Playboy, cheating on her husband with Wilmer Valderrama, even going to the zoo and throwing handfuls of human feces at the spider monkeys.

Ultimately, she decided to use one of her biggest assets. 

On November 1, 2010, Julia Roberts became a Guinness Book of World Records holder by becoming the first person to fit 237 Peanut Butter M&Ms in her mouth at once (and holding them in there for 1 full minute).

Unfortunately, neither her fans nor Hollywood was impressed and its already back to the drawing board for Julia. She has decided to see what else she can fit in her mouth. Her husband, Daniel Moder, had no comment.

PS. Welcome back nothingRelevant.com!

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Hugh “Hef” Hefner, popular founder of Playboy Magazine and the luckiest man alive, has announced that he will drop the robe and take off the pajamas to pose nude in an upcoming issue of his magazine. Hef (82 years old), said that throughout the 55+ year history of Playboy he has made millions upon millions of dollars by exposing the world to the beauty of the female body, now he is going to give back and expose himself in honor of all those former playmates.

Anybody up for some expired sausage for breakfast?

There has never been a pictorial featuring a man or a dick (with exception of the interview pics of Bill Maher).

Hefner will not replace the female centerfold pictorial but will be featured in a 6-page spread in the later third of the magazine. Hef’s new girlfriends, the 19 year old twins, the Shannon sisters (who are surprisingly unattractive), along with several other playmates will appear nude in the photos with him. The final picture, however, will be a full-frontal of the old man eating a peach in front of the grotto with his old balls and wrinkly shaft prominently displayed for the world to see.

When asked what he thinks his mostly male demographic will think when they see his dusty twig and berries, Hef said, “I realize that the majority of my readers are buying Playboy to see hot, beautiful naked women, not my decrepid ‘package’. But again, I am doing this for the thousands of women who have appeared in my magazines and, at the very least, this will give men an idea of what their manhood will look like when they are in their senior years.”

One wonders if Hef will take some Viagra or Cialis before doing the shoot do give his crotchal region more life?

Enjoy!

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